Saturday, September 1, 2012

And just why do I get high?

“They give me disease, they give me a pain in my neck to feed off me”-John Frusciante.

Ricochet through the good times. Rumble with incoherent banter of the babble that spills love that surprises me the morning after. The bottles opens, my lips quiver with excited anticipation of the times to come. Flowing down the throat, the slow poison drowns my being into an emanation of love. Beaming with a radiant gleam of happiness, my being zones out into a parallel state of me.

A utopian state of mind descends upon a brain cranked up on endorphins. The world turns slowly, yet the time passes by so fast. Ascension from a lull into primal state of being with needs and wants only affixing themselves to basic needs of man, a contextual state of bliss slowly seethes in.   

Each gulp brings you closer to euphoria. Every sip opens up a jar of happiness that not only stems from you but branches out and breathes. Smiling faces, lips stretched from ear to ear and the auto-pilot mode your body goes into. Numb with a certain level of detachment and reattachment to the thought process that press the most touching issues of the hour, shake hands with me.

Living in my being day in and day out, a certain amount of time spent being detached is rejuvenating to say the least. Drowned in generous amounts of euphoria, the state of being not only absorbs me in completely but also becomes a weft of me.

Pushing, pulling, absorbing, every step of the way seems like a walk into the abyss. It’s a lovely moment which I tend to spend drowned in happiness in a world that gives me enough and more reasons to not believe in happiness and love.

Giving into reckless abandon is therapeutic. It’s a spa therapy for the soul, one which at times condones logic and reasoning – perfect for this illogical life.

Explanations are excuses. And I love explaining why I love getting high. With each passing day, crawl further towards death. In a state of thought that purports my yearnings of the sweet nectar, yet in many other only logically states that I should be far more generous towards my personal happiness.

 Ways and means turn up a new page of discussing the pros and cons of the medium yet I tend to take only to alcohol for reaching the heavens. Weed and hash just don’t seem to take to me kindly. I only get overtly hungry and lazy, all of which I love but then again not something to look forward to. That kick of craziness just doesn’t come through so easily, probably because everything becomes such a task to manage. If I wanted my world to get tougher I wouldn’t have been getting high in the first place.

Disconnection with the world and only focusing on the task at hand is what I feel lovely about when indulging the sweet poison. Such positive vibes flow through me that it’s just plain stupid not to partake in the revelry within. Give in and feel the love cast its spell slowly, steadily. The world slowly lifts off its mask and becomes a tad easier to believe in.

Not as an exit but more like the Promised Land. The alcohol might serve as a portal for escape but to me it’s a getaway to a land of happiness and love. Not delusional but just plain descriptive.

In me, within me the liquid flows down into the depths of me. 

“A liquid embrace to chase the day away, sweetly she draws me into her arms.” “The dark mistress of many, beholden to none.”  –Randy Blythe.

Court her, be together – in sickness and in health and flirt till death do us apart. Every drop serves to make you smile. Stepping up the levels of euphoria with endorphins going berserk, the mind feels a numbing calm descend over it.

Slip down the chasm of self and into a never-ending void, a void that delivers you from being. A being that has been shaped and contoured by the society which smothers an individual for the ‘greater good’ of the collective. 

Drink, converse, smile, be. Uncomplicate and indulge. 

Simplify life and live in the moments that weave together to become a life time.

No comments: